Such useful things, men are. Gotta love ’em.

I was talking to a friend who considers herself a feminist. She’s one of those women who would get a slipped disc before she asked a man to help her carry her widescreen TV through a revolving door, harrumph, take that, male chauvinist pig! She pays her own bills, drives her own car, all that “Independent Woman” shtick.

But then, so do I.

Furthermore, I can change a tire, fix a leaky faucet, assemble a Tamiya/Battle Beadaman/Zoid/Crush Gear/Hotwheels playset, and program a VCR. Plus, the office photocopier loves me and will apparently work properly only within my proximity.

The main difference between us is that she feels empowered by rejecting a man’s offer of help, while I think that men are just the greatest labor-saving device on the planet.

I see no point in getting my own hands dirty, or working up a sweat, when there’s a perfectly handy male specimen about most of the time. Just because I prefer to ask a man to do the dirty work (usually with a smile and a judicious amount of eyelash-batting) and save myself the trouble, it doesn’t mean I’m allowing my womanhood to be trodden upon. It’s just me saving myself the trouble. The bonus? The guy feels like he’s this big, strong superhero, coming to the rescue of the damsel in distress. Puffs him up, I get things done. Easy peasy. Doors are opened for me, chairs are pulled out when I take my seat, I walk on the safe side when crossing the street. The security guards at our building know me, greet me with a smile and now and then a little salute, and are always quick to find me a parking space. The little perks of knowing when to smile, and always being a lady.

My friend thinks I’m perpetuating the stereotype of women being helpless, hapless, mindless bimbos who can’t exist without a man there. I don’t. Men are useful, and they’re most useful when they’re happy. So how much skin off my nose will it be if I ask a guy nicely to please lift that awfully heavy box, oh you big strong wonderful thing you, my hero? A woman has power in abundance — the real challenge is knowing when and where to use it.

I believe, fiercely, in getting ahead on your own merits. I work for what I have, and I pay my own way. I’m proud of the things I’ve done, and where I am. I don’t need to prove anything to anyone, and I’d gladly accept a man’s offer of assistance if it’ll make my life easier because I know myself well, and I know that it doesn’t take away from who I am, it isn’t an admission of weakness, and it isn’t an insult. I also know how to choose my battles, and maximize resources.

Like men. 😀

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4 Comments

  1. Mobile Man said,

    Wednesday, January 11, 2006 at 2:51 pm

    Ah, I’m so glad to meet a woman who actually thinks this way! Frankly, I’m tired of all that feminist rigmarole about women perpetuating stereotypes of helplessness. The truth is, a woman who allows a man to do things for her is in fact the one in a position of power. She is being served, she is getting her way, she…

    Hey, wait a minute! This sounds suspiciously like the man playing the role of the sub!

    Gah. At any rate, if feminists feel so strongly about this, then perhaps they should encourage women to open doors for men, lift heavy weights for them, and fix their leaky faucets. Does that sound better?

  2. miranoriel said,

    Wednesday, January 11, 2006 at 3:03 pm

    “…a woman who allows a man to do things for her is in fact the one in a position of power. She is being served, she is getting her way, she…”

    How very… perceptive of you, Mobile Man. Heheh.

    Plus, if a woman is gracious (not gushy!) about accepting a man’s help, and allows him to feel that he’s doing her a huge favor he alone can bestow, then that’s just… service, with a smile. The best kind. 😀

  3. shepherd said,

    Sunday, April 9, 2006 at 2:51 pm

    Um…sorry I mispelled “shepherd all night!! LOL

    I am a blond redhead!! LOL

  4. shepherd said,

    Sunday, April 9, 2006 at 2:52 pm

    “while I think that men are just the greatest labor-saving device on the planet.”

    I LOVE that line!


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